Do You Feel Good Enough?
Have you ever heard someone say, “if only I were prettier”? Or smarter? Or faster? Or taller? Maybe that someone was you. And maybe you find yourself saying that …
Every. Single. Day.
This negative self-talk can leave us feeling paralyzed with fear and self-doubt. We just feel like we’re never good enough, so we don’t bother taking any action.
It turns out that this line of thinking is all too common, especially among women. In fact, according to Dr. Claire Zammit, “I’m not enough” is one of the three main inner barriers that girls and women face throughout their lives. (The other two are “I’m alone” and “I’m invisible.”)
So what if I told you that you are good enough and you have everything you need to succeed? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I’ve heard that before. But you don’t believe it … and therein lies the problem.
We are often the biggest obstacle to our own success. We internalize the noise around us and let it dictate our lives. So how do we put an end to this self-sabotage?
Don’t compare your day 1 to someone else’s day 1000.
When you’re scrolling through Instagram, it is very easy to fall into the trap of comparing yourself to the sculpted and tanned bodies that flock your Insta feed. Remember: everyone starts off as a beginner. E-ve-ry-one. This mindset is especially important when forming new habits. As you incorporate something new into your routine, you won’t always “get it right.” You’re still figuring out this new routine that incorporates this new habit. Developing habits takes time. Show yourself kindness and grace in this transition period. These sculpted bodies on Insta were achieved after months of dedication and persistence. (Or in some cases, through advanced Photoshopping techniques. But that’s a topic for another day …)
Don’t self-reject. We take ourselves out of the game before the game has even started. Do you want a raise? Ask for it. Do you want to join a board? Submit your application. Do you want to learn a new skill? Sign up for an online course or find a how-to book at your local library.
Once you start saying “yes” in one area of your life, you’ll feel empowered to say “yes” in other areas.
Do acknowledge your successes throughout your journey. Keep a journal of your proudest moments that you can look through when you feel self-doubt creeping in. It’ll be your timeline of all the times you said “yes” to believing in yourself. Next time an opportunity presents itself, ask yourself, “Why not me?” and go for it.
What’s your proudest moment of overcoming self-doubt?
Demi Dee is a certified Canadian fitness trainer and holistic health coach, and the Founder and CEO of The Knockout Room®. Demi is the creator of The Knockout Protocol: Raising Your Superhero Tween to Look and Feel Her Best, her signature health program for moms and their tween girls.